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Miss Manners Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin
Miss Manners road: My son and his family live four hours and often visit our two grandchildren. One of the rules I have is not food or drinks in the living room or bedrooms. Growing up, we could never have food anywhere, but on the table.
Their family is huge fans of a certain coffee business, and during the last visit the drinks from this business were brought to their bedroom. The younger child, which is sometimes stupid and constantly jumps, caused a spill onto the carpet.
I had his sister and he cleaned the mess. It ended up in stress, furious and guilty. On the other hand, my son was worried that his money and drinks were wasted.
This is a constant fight during a visit, because parents allow food and drinks in their rooms at home. They think that I do not allow this to value my furniture for children’s comfort. These children also make my mother sleep on a cot when they take a bed for guests. Mom goes with it and never complains. Am I wrong?
A delicate reader: Your son cannot drink coffee and children’s jumps either. If he does not want to waste things, he should be interested in safely maintaining food and drinks at the table. You can pay attention to this discrepancy.
But although Miss Manners generally agrees that the guests’ comfort has priority over rugs and furniture, has its boundaries and usually concern children. Just because they want to jump on furniture and throw things home does not mean that it should be allowed. Repetition of this and other home rules is reasonable and justified.
When it comes to displacing your daughter -in -law, it may be better to leave their family. You can try to say loudly: “Margo, wouldn’t you prefer to sleep on the bed? I am sure that children will not have nothing against the cot. It will be like a sleeping camp. ”
By the way, they can soon find out that the sleeping camp has so many rules that they will miss the grandmother’s simpler at home.
Send your questions to Miss Manners on her website, www.missmanners.com; to her e -mail, dearissmanners@gmail.com; or via postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMmeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.